My review of 'Bread - The Movie'

Due to my dedication to the study of film and TV I consider myself something of an expert when it comes to the visual arts so I thought I would share my review of my latest viewing - 'Bread - The Movie.'

At the risk of coming across as uncharitable it is the worst thing I have watched all year (and I watched 'The Meg' a few months back so that is saying something!). The plot was thin at best, the dialogue was non-existent and the performance by the main actor can only be described as 'doughy'. It reminded me of those French art house films where the actors spend most of the time, in close up, not uttering a word and looking intensely at each other. The sound track was largely absent apart from some periodic rumbling and in fairness that could have been my stomach. The only part of the film that was above expectations was the Directors use of scent (have I discovered Smellyvision?) and if I was searching for positives I would say that the lighting was quite atmospheric.

So for me this is an 'avoid' unless the garden is devoid of pigeons on a rainy day. If they release a sequel I shall be pressing my snooze button, its not for me.